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Continued from page 86.

At last I am fairly brought upon this miserable Stage whereon so many tricks, pranks, and antics are daily, and hourly performed: whereon the busy throng of bipedes calling themselves rational, anxiously toil to be happy and almost always chuse the very reverse means to obtain that end. Like every child of my rank in life my first infancy was confided to the care of menials, who as is generally the case, thought they had faithfully performed their part in feeding, washing, dressing and undressing me, and in indulging my little fancies provided they did not militate against their ease and caprice. Soon after I was sent to school in order to get rid of my noise; then I had a private Tutor to initiate me in the rudiments of learning, and then at last obtained admission in the King’s Military school near Paris to become, without much caring whether it was my inclination or not, a Military hero. Happily the frequent sight of the three-cocked-hat with a fine cockade, and shoulder knots of gold or silver, of the proud gaiety and the seemingly easy life of a Soldier, made me anticipate the happiness that awaited me and reconciled me with my destination; and indeed in due time I was aggregated to that Body of young thoughtless fellows, who careless of a life already in a manner resigned, perfectly indifferent of the means by which, they may lose it, let it be by overindulging in their pleasure, by the bullet aimed at them by the hand of honor or by the bayonet of their King and country’s enemy.

I shall not dwell on that early stage of my military career but limit myself to a few circumstances which, not concerning me directly yet appear deserving to be mentioned. Being in garrison I applied for a leave of absence to the Commandant of the place, who transmitted my application to the minister at the war-department,—Before the return of his answer application was made to the commandant, for a permit for post horses for the next day, a formality required on the frontier fortresses in France. The stranger that made it, added at the same time that in case the Commandant knew any person wishing to go to Paris he offered a seat in his post chaise on paying for the additional horse, whereupon the Commandant sent for me and asked whether I would take advantage of this offer; on my answer that I would if he gave me leave, he granted it under the condition, that I should not appear publicly until he had transmitted to me the Minister’s answer.

It was late on an evening in the month of November; the stranger had ordered the horse for 6 o’clock the next morning and of course I had very little time to make the necessary preparations. Happily a Subaltern residing in Barracks is seldom overloaded and encumbered with goods and chattels and I was ready at the appointed hour and place. I found my unknown fellow Traveller already sitting in his chaise. Having informed him that I was the person addressed to him by the commandant on his invitation I seated myself at his side; the door was shut upon us, the Driver’s whip cracked lustily, and our four tho’ not surefooted animals rattled our vehicles as fast as they could on the rough pavement. I have already said that it was in that gloomy month so fatal to those afflicted with the disease learnedly called tedium vitae, but more vulgarly known under the name of blue Devils. Thank God! I never was under the influence of that dismal affection and foggy November was then as welcome to me as gay May. Notwithstanding the sleepless night, had spent in preparation and the darkness of the morning I did not feel the least inclination to sleep. Consequently I tried to enter into conversation with my compagnon de voyage, but nothing more than dry monosyllables could I extract from his mouth. Soon after I had certain indications that Morpheus had bound him in his iron fetters. With so taciturn and so dry a neighbour I could not build the hope of a very pleasant journey. I had not yet had a sight of his person but by the space he seemed to occupy in the carriage and by the tosses I received from time to time with his head on my shoulders. I judged him to be a short lusty man, and on the dawning of the day, when fogs and mists permitted me to take a fair view of him I saw that I was not mistaken in my idea of his person. As to his countenance, it said very little for or against him in the placidity of his sleep.

We continued, moving onwards and arrived when broad day at the first station where we were to change horses and to enjoy a welcome breakfast. My travelling companion was roused out of his peaceful slumber, and after having rubbed his eyes and taken a rapid survey of the premises, he walked in to one of those houses, where the degree of hospitality is regulated by the means of purchasing it. We were in that province, which, would inevitably be one of the richest in the world, if only half of the wine, (called after its name), that is drunk all over the world, was truly the juice of the grapes matured within its precincts. But this is far from being the case.

The Districts in which the several qualities of champaign wines are produced are extremely limited in extent, and incapable of answering to the hundredth part of the demand for that beverage so highly valued by Voluptaries. Here as in many other respects my taste is far from agreeing with that of the generality of Epicures for I never could relish it. My dislike for it perhaps may be attributed to my having been made intoxicated the first time I drank some at a breakfast that several of us on our being knighted companions of the order of St. Lazare gave to our brother officers. I was so sick from that excess, that not only I took a thorough dislike to that wine but also it has guarded me ever after against excess in drinking.

On those days the slops now used almost every where for breakfast had not reached France and therefore I was compelled to help the swallowing up of ham and bread with a few glasses of wine, but remained far behind my brother traveller, who seemed to relish still better and better each successive bumper which he swallowed. But the volatility of the liquor had not apparently any effect on his taciturnity and very few words excepted, our time at least on this part, was entirely spent on the present business which done we resumed our seats in the chaise and our journey onwards.

In this silent manner we proceeded until at last we reached the capital of the Province famous for its Ste. Ampoule and for being the place where the Kings of France used to be anointed and crowned. There again we alighted and ordered the best dinner the Inn at which we stopped could afford, for I have always remarked that at those places the worst fare is always the dearest. We were soon summoned to sit in judgment on the culinary skill of the Cook and on the contents of the cellar and to be sure both were sanctioned by the manner in which we went on the trial. Here the features of my fellow traveller began to relax and his tongue to be loosed, for he favoured me how and then not only with a tolerable benignant look, but also, when his jaws were at liberty, with a few words here and there, which convinced me that he might, if he would, be a pleasant companion enough.

Our refreshment completed we continued our progress towards the south and nothing happening to stop us we safely reached our evening station, at which we resolved to take a hearty parting kiss, not on, but of the neck of the beautifully elongated neck of the bottle of the Country. The effect of that third tête a tête, was that conviviality was complete and reserve was entirely left behind when we resumed our seats in the carriage, resolved as we were to go on during the night in order to reach Paris early in the morning, and in consequence he carefully primed his pistols and I tried how easy my sword could be drawn out of the scabbard. Thank God however these precautions were found useless, for saving some few Coal-burners and wooden shoe manufacturers whom we could from time to time see moving about like shadows round a blazing fire in the woods, we met with no one to try either our courage or our weapons.

It was then in this latter part of our journey that my travelling companion, after proper apologies for his apparent neglect of me in the former and having paid several fine compliments on the openness of my countenance, &c. &.c. added that he dared to repose in me that degree of confidence which it would be imprudent in his situation to bestow on every one, and on my word of honour being given to him that I should not disclose any communications which he should think proper to make to me, he continued thus: “You must know, Sir, that I am the agent employed by the Duc de Choiseul, to carry on the communication between him and the British North American Colonies. I have made already many voyages across the Atlantic with the instructions and sums of money necessary to keep up the flame that he the Duc, has himself kindled, from the moment that he found himself in a manner compelled to yield Canada to the English. Indeed he would perhaps have continued the late war for a few years longer had he not thought that the cession of the French possessions in North America would pave the way and facilitate his grand object in view, namely, an absolute Secession between the Colonies and the Mother Countries.” He entered then into further details of the Duc’s plans and ways, and the greatest part of our conversation until our final separation in Paris turned on that subject.

This happened in the month of November, 1774, and my obligation to secrecy was for no longer a period than the result of the contest. Thus it is in a great measure to the insidious policy of the Duc de Choiseul that we are indebted for the French Revolution and its concomitant crimes and horrors.

To be continued.

Continued from page 94.

They were however soon awoke from that lethargic state by the unnatural rebellion of their neighbours. No sooner did they hear the sound of the drum than their patriotism and their loyalty, until then dormant, were rekindled. We find the first names in the Colony amongst those, who made use of the little influence they had left to induce their old tenants to arm themselves in defence of their new government, and then led them not only against the rebels but even against their own old Countrymen who supported them. Forgetful of former ties, regardless of blood, connections, of origin, even of old friendship, they followed the banners of their new masters and many bled in their defence. There is even no doubt that it was that remnant of influence which rendered abortive the many attempts to corrupt the fidelity of the Canadians and make them swerve from their new allegiance.

But so soon as peace was made, and the independence of the revolted Colonies was acknowledged, the Canadian free corps were immediately disbanded, and their leaders left to return to their obscurity and nullity. Nothing, however, could extinguish that warlike spirit that had been transmitted to them from generation to generation. The French revolution carried the torch of the war into the four quarters of the Globe, and it was necessary to provide for the security of this Colony. On a sudden a military corps was raised by, and at the expense of the very same families so long neglected. At the head of this corps, proud of the name of Loyal Canadian Volunteers, which they had adopted, and which they were well determined to deserve and to support, we find Longueil Rouville, Salaberry, and amongst the officers, the most respectable names in the country, such as the Duchesnays, the Rouvilles, Stertel Salaberrys, d’Estamanvilles, Lanaudieres, Bleury Duprés, Bouchers and others. Unluckily that corps had no opportunity of sealing with blood their unshakeable loyalty.

We wish that we could remain silent on the fate of that corps, for the rising of which many had sacrificed the little they were possessed of. But it is too well known that the news had no sooner reached this country that peace had been concluded between England and the then French government, in the beginning of this century, than the Loyal Canadian Volunteers were ordered to lay down their arms, and their officers were dismissed without any indemnity whatever. Had this reduction taken place from a principle of economy, nothing would have been thought of it; but there is but too much reason to suppose that economy was not the motive of so sudden a reduction, particularly when we consider, that soldiers of the disbanded corps, were immediately incorporated into a new one, amongst whose officers, no Canadian names appeared.

One would have supposed, that after such mishaps, the military order of the Canadian gentry, would have been quite damped but no. Ten or eleven years after, our kind and modest neighbours, thinking that the opportunity of wresting this Country from England was favorable, declared war and attempted to take the Canadas, by a Coup de main. Here again we see the same names and a great number more eagerly enlisting under the British banners, and corps were again raised, to meet the threatening foe; young end old, rich and poor, eagerly came forward to defend their King and Country, and by their example and influence, they afforded to the unprepared Government, the means of resisting the invasion of the enemy, until the arrival of the necessary assistance from the mother Country.

The Canadians have in this manner, repeated the most unquestionable proofs of their loyalty, of their attachment to the Constitution of the Empire, and of their devotedness to their King. These feelings are part of their very essence, and transmitted to them from generation to generation, and one may boldly assert, that they will pass as heirlooms to their posterity. Here, however, a question arises, namely; how is it then that in spite of such loyal feelings, Government so often meets with resistance and opposition? The solution of this apparent contradiction, is rather of a delicate nature. Let us try, however, to enter upon it; it may lead to the means of removing the cause of that resistance and opposition, and of restoring that harmony, from which alone the prosperity of this Colony can proceed.

We have heard repeatedly, and especially during the American revolutionary war, heavy complaints of a real or supposed influence, which ruled behind the curtain his Majesty’s Councils. The British Constitution has very wisely set a barrier against the abuse of the immense power necessarily vested in a single individual screened against any responsibility, by inviolability, and by his being declared incapable of doing wrong. The whole of that responsibility rests on the ostensible and well known advisers of the Crown, namely on the ministers. So much the worse for them if they suffer their master or themselves to be led into improper measures by advisers neither known or acknowledged as such. Here therefore, the danger of inviolability cannot be very great, but suppose now that there be no real advisers either known or acknowledged as such, on whom shall fall the public vengeance in case of palpable transgressions, certainly not on that Chief Magistrate whom you have pronounced inviolable. In that case: influence is dangerous, and the least evil that it can produce, must be a kind of uneasy sensation in the mind of those who suffer from it. There follows of course, a certain distrust, which makes the governed watch with a jealous eye, all the measures of Government, and leads to resistance and opposition.

But, will it be asked; what is the ground of suspicion that such an influence exists in this Country? If that which has been said before be not a sufficient answer to the question, we shall be ready at any time and when required, to state more particularly those grounds. Our intention does not go farther for the present, than to account for that want of harmony between the several branches of the Legislature, and for that kind of resistance and opposition which government too often meets on the part of the popular branch.

C. D. E.

To be continued.

WITH A VIEW TO THE RECOMMENDATION OF A BETTER SYSTEM.

Continued from page 92.

To this chief cause of the exhausted state of the lands, may we not add, that, during the above period, a great proportion of the argilaceous or clayey parts, of the soil, has been washed off by the rains? A certain proportion of clay is also absolutely requisite to form soils of the first quality; but clay is held in partial solution by water, whilst sand, the other constituent of the soils, is not, and, in the long course of two hundred years, a great proportion of the clays of the cultivated uplands, must have been taken up, and carried off by the rains; and this is a second cause of their gradual deterioration.

In the lower parts of the Parish of St. Foy’s wheat is, (in some seasons,) produced in three to four times more quantity than on the lands above, in that Parish, tho’ both should be equally well manured. The lands above bearing a greater proportion of sand, the rains are not well retained by them, but pass thro’. It is not so with well clayed lands: clay is known to retain moisture, and to absorb it from the atmosphere, in nigh double the proportion that sand does, as has been proved by the very accurate, and fine experiment of Professor Leslie. And it is confirmed by the superior yield of all lands, having a sufficient proportion of clay in their composition, and it has been proved, according to an experienced French Chemist, that the best proportions of a fertile earth for corn, are three eights of clay, two eights of sand, and three eights of the fragments of hard stone.

These, then, appear to be the leading causes of the lands of the Province having fallen off so greatly from their original powers of production, and became defective of those they might be made to attain.

First, the wearing them out by continual corn crops without being sufficiently manured by the past and present practice of leaving them en friche.

Secondly, by a deficiency in extirpating the weeds from the lands, and, in not sowing that quantity of seed which, wipe they properly nourished these lands would bring to maturity.

Thirdly, either an original defect exists in regard to the due proportion of day in the lands below Quebec, and about twenty leagues above it. This deficiency has grown, by the best of the soil being washed away by the rains, at least off the highest lands. It is of no consequence, which of these causes occasion this deficiency; it is clear that it exists, and any mode that could be devised for restoring this important ingredient of the best sods, would render a very important service to most of this Province.

Respecting the first cause; it seems surprising that altho’ the markets of the Province, must have for some years past afforded a demand for more cattle, that the most abundant method of producing food for them, by taking crops of nutritious roots from the lands, instead of laying them en friche, have not been long generally practised. Whether, in order to bring agriculture to this desirable state, it will be adviseable in this Province, for its Legislature to favour it, by imposing a light duty on foreign cattle, as is now done in a sister Province, it is for the wisdom of this Legislature to determine. Certain however, I believe it to be, that were one eighth of the lands now en friche, to be sown with potatoe crops, clover or turnips, they would produce double or treble sufficient cattle to supply the town markets, and give thereby a great overplus for exportation. And that the ensuing corn crops, on those lands, would be nigh doubled, we have, I trust as good reason to believe, would ensue in this Province, as it is stated above to have done since the practice of modern agriculture has been introduced into Scotland. It may indeed be (in case of a general introduction of root and green crops by rotation,) that a difficulty would at first arise, in getting sufficient manure; but, this difficulty, would be diminishing every season, and the increasing number of fat cattle, and the vast additional yield of rich manures, the natural effects of this mode of agriculture would probably remove it in a few seasons. It is also to be observed, that the present modes of preparing compost heaps, by converting inert vegetable substances, into good manure, has, it is said, enabled the modern farmer to multiply his manure four or five fold.

The subject of manures, having however, been treated in a very full and able manner in the celebrated letters of Agricola, lately written in Halifax, and about to be printed in one or more Vols. I shall at present offer but little more on that head.

To be continued.

We are happy to find, that the four Bales of Croculus indicus, mentioned in one of our late numbers, are not for the use of the merchant to whom they were directed, and we are in hope, that on their having been put up at public sale, they will have been bought for re-exportation; satisfied that we are, that wealth acquired by honest industry shall never be contaminated by an increase obtained at the expense of the health and perhaps of the life of fellow creatures; by administering to them poison under the allurements of a wholesome and pleasant beverage. Our worthy magistrates are warned! and will certainly not fail to prevent, if possible, or to bring to Justice, a public nuisance of that nature!

———————

To the Editor of the Enquirer.

Sir,

If you think the following worthy a place in your interesting publication, I shall be happy to see it in your next.

In contemplating the history of nations, we find that though they differ in their manners, and pursuits, yet in an aversion to slavery, and a desire of liberty, they all agreed. To defend their territories from the incursions of enemies, and themselves submitting to any foreign or neighbouring yoke, their principal desire. To be free they were ready to endure the greatest miseries; for liberty they were willing to die. The love of liberty must therefore be an inherent principle in man, which neither unpropitiousness of climate, or the miseries of poverty are able to erase. In the cold regions of the North it burns with as much heat, as in the warm climates of the torrid zone. On points of religion, in matters of public importance, men often vary, and in their likes and dislikes there is much difference; but, in their preferring poverty and liberty, to riches and dependance, there can be but few dissenting voices. Venal indeed must the mind of that man be, who would not rather endure privations, and be his own master, than to “fare sumptuously every day,” and be subject to the will, and caprice of another.

Such were some of my thoughts, as I lately retrospected the past occurrences of my life; a life often chequered by misfortunes, but during the whole course of which (my bosom glows at the thought), I never stooped to obtain favour from the wealthy, or courted the company of the great. I have ever thought, that hands and feet, were given to man, to enable him to procure his subsistence, and that while he had them, he had no occasion to be dependant on the bounty of another.

I Remain, Sir, Yours truly,

A. Z.

———————

TO THE EDITOR OF THE ENQUIRER,

Sir,

In no way whatever can genius have a better chance of displaying itself than in the management of political affairs, how seldom however, do we see uncommon abilities, (though no doubt there are such) exercised by those who guide the helm of administration, how seldom do we see (in the present age) men of strictly unimpeached integrity, possessed of power. In surveying with an impartial eye, the republics of the present day we shall I think be convinced of this observation, but, without taking such an extensive range let us be content with considering our own little constitution. Degraded Liberty raises in our breasts emotions of unfeigned regret, on perceiving that even this country that leans on generous Britain for support is partly governed by men, guided by selfish principles, even here we see the man who is recommended by interest and power, conduct himself in the most ostentatious and unseemly manner towards those whom he deems his inferiors, supported in his profligate expenditure, by what should be the maintenance of merit, even here we see the man who could act with applause, in a situation, superior to that in which he now is placed, kept down and domineered over by the menial slaves of command. In vain are abilities exhibited, in vain are talents displayed, before the eyes of ruling power, if not backed, if not supported by interest. On the man although “communa sensu plane caret” if introduced as the friend of such a one, is taken by the hand, and promoted to affluence. All this effected by well timed flattery, a little servility. Actual observation for many years (in which I have been no small traveller) has convinced me, that such is the manner in which the man assisted by interest has been exalted over those more deserving than himself. Far be it for me to observe, much less to think, that this is the general principle of governments. No: by experience I know the contrary. That, it is so in some institutions and not so in others is too obvious to need any explanation. The limits of your paper Mr. Editor will not permit me at present to say anything more. If you think this worthy of insertion, I may at some future period trouble you with a continuation.

AMICUS MERITI.

———————

FOR THE ENQUIRER.

While an Englishman preserves those characteristics of bluntness and sincerity which nature has bestowed upon, him, he continues a very respectable being; but when he suffers French grimace and Italian effeminacy to eject these less showy, yet more substantial endowments, he becomes an object truly contemptible. A sirloin of beef is very properly attended by a good plum pudding and a tankard of porter. And we sit down to the feast with a hearty appetite; but serve up the same dish with a fricassee of frogs, soup-maigre and vapid French wine, we should be ready to kick the Cook and damn the dinner.

Mr. Tonbelly was a wealthy grazier in ------; but unluckily did not acquire the greater part of his wealth ’til his son Tony had almost attained the age of manhood; his papa was resolved however, to make a gentleman of him; and at the age of twenty-one sent him to learn dancing and the graces, under the tuition of Mr. Wall Du Val. A Swiss footman taught him to murder a few French phrases; and thus equipt, he set out upon his travels.

The politesse of the French has complimented every Englishman with the title of My Lord, who tacitly submits to their impositions, and squanders away his money with unmeaning profusion; a title which Tony soon obtained; for he was never backward at creating a riot, in order to be bullied out of his cash; or collecting a mob in the street, by throwing money out of the window, to confirm the canaille in their opinion of my Lord Tonbelly’s affluence.

Though young Tony might have made a very respectable carcase-butcher, or have become as good an orator as most of those who figure away at Couchmakers Hall, yet Paris was by no means the meridian calculated for his talents.

Dress being an indispensable appendage to a man of fortune, Tony was delivered over to the management of a French Taylor, who soon bedizened him with lace, and equipped him in the extremes of the mode. To have a just idea of our traveller, the reader may imagine a fine brawny young fellow, fatter than many an ox his father had sold in Smithfield, with his toes turned in, his shoulders parallel to his ears, his cheeks hanging down with fat, his eyes sunk into his head; his double chin like Sir Fletcher Norton’s, his head bare frized and graced by a queüe, resembling a horn’s tail cased for fear of the dirt: while a diminutive skeleton of a taylor stood before him, declaring that my Lord Tonbelly was a majestic figure, and that he had all the air of a man of qualitee, only that his tail was much too leetle.

Having seen all the wonderful sights at Paris, the Boulevards, the Thuillieries, slept an evening at the Theatres, because he did not understand the language; picked up a demi rib; and got himself pretty handsomely fleeced, he thought himself sufficiently acquainted with Paris, and therefore proceeded in the course of his tour to visit Rome.

Wealth can always procure friends; and Tony was not wanting in having recommendations; and when he arrived at Rome, he soon got himself into the best of company, a circumstance not difficult in that capital for any foreigner that cuts a figure; travellers there not being regularly presented by ambassadors, and the Pope not having the etiquette of other Princes. Tony was one night at the Conversatione of the Prince Berghoise, when he happened to meet the all conquering eyes of the Princess Mattie, His Highness’s sister, and one of the finest women in Italy.—The moment he beheld her, Cupid played him a scurvy trick; and as Hudibras expresses it,

He never had an opportunity of making a declaration, but having judged from the assertion of our Travel-mongers, that the ladies in Italy are as common as in the Republic of Plato, or at least easily conquered by cash, he grounded his hopes on his purse, and chose for the confidant of his intrigue one Abbe Bertolle, a notorious attorney of Venus. The Abbe perceiving his client’s stupidity, resolved to turn it to his own profit, and encouraged him in his golden dream. He pretended to carry some of Tony’s letters to the Princess and brought counterfeit answers, taking care to be well paid for every epistle. When he thought the correspondence was ripe enough to bring forth the expected fruit he produced a letter which contained proposals from the Princess, to crown Tony’s wishes on the immediate disbursements of five hundred guineas.

The demand was readily complied with by the aspiring lover; and at an appointed hour he was conducted to a very famous impure, who, on account of her striking personal resemblance to the Princess Mattie, had assumed her name. The likeness, the elegance of the apartments where he was received, and the behaviour of the lady, all tended to complete the lover’s delusion. So well did she act her part, that his fancy, was all night wrapt up in the height of happiness; though Ixion like, for a Juno he embraced a cloud; a few days after, however, feeling something that smarted more than the shaft of Cupid, he repaired to the Conversatione where, assuming a very indignant countenance, his absurdity went so far as to express several disrespectful hints against the Princess’s character.—Being called to an account, by some nobleman, he unfolded the dismal story but was soon made sensible of his mistake.

The Abbe has been condemned to be flogged through the principal streets by the common executioner, and sent to the galleys for life. Tony was obliged to ask pardon and was then banished from Rome by his Holiness’s orders; and he is now returned to entertain his dear father with an account of his tour through Europe.

———————

FOR THE ENQUIRER.

Sir,

The return of Spring, which is generally a source of pleasure and joy to others, will whenever it returns, return to me with an increase of vexation, from the peculiar singularities of my confounded wife; for though she never travelled beyond Point Levi, Lorette, or Beauport in her life, she has filled her head with as many rural ideas, as if she had been an inhabitant of the metropolis of Great Britain or wandered the groves of Italy with Petrarch and his Laura.

Every room in my house from the garret to the cellar bears testimony of her taste for the production of nature; the leads, and the rails of the windows are crowded with pots, pans, vegetables and evergreens; the light of the kitchen is totally excluded by a set of physic phials, set close together, and filled with mint; the dining-room windows are so cross’d with laths and pack-thread, that were it not for the kidney-beans, I should suppose myself in a spunging-house; while every chimney in the house is set out with bow-pots from Montreal market. Upon my enquiring for my best wig-box the other day, my dear rural wife told me, that she had sown a small salad in it of mustard and cress, which would be ready in a few days. Her passion for the vegetable world is so predominant, that not a broken chamberpot escapes being till’d with some plant or other; and at present she has a Geranium in full blow, which to save expenses, is stuck in a close-stool pan; a Myrtle in a butter firkin; an orange tree in a washing tub; a tulip in a salt-box; and a young gooseberry bush in a punch-bowl. My bed room is so filled with flowers, that I am in nightly dread of being perfumed to death before morning; besides I am daily threatened with indictments for, being a nuisance to my neighbours, as scarce a day passes without some pot or pan tumbling on the heads of the passengers. I am obliged to carry a nosegay in my bosom as big as those Carlo Khan used to wear when a professed Macarom,^[1] because my wife says it is so courtified, and has such a rural appearance, and I can seriously assert, that a very short time ago, she was thrown into convulsions at being told that the cat had kittened on the parsley-bed which grew on the top shelf of the pantry.

In a word, sir, what with rural soneetes and rural conversation, rural ornaments and rural nonsense of one kind or other, my patience is fairly exhausted, and I am determined, unless a speedy reformation takes place, to turn the whole kitchen-garden out of the house, send the parsley-bed into the dust-tub, pack up the shrubbery in a hamper—or send my wife to the regions of Nova Scotia, where she may cultivate potatoes and cabbage plants, and have full leisure to improve and enjoy her rural ideas,

I am, Sir,

Yours, &c.

No Ruralist.

———————

Mr. Editor,

I am an old widower, turned of sixty, and like many hundreds, about me, can still distinguish chains in the fair, which I am not willing yet totally to relinquish. I am rich, or at least was lately, when I took a liking to a lovely damsel of two-and-twenty. Love, prudence, and sincerity seemed to be engraved on her countenance, and I thought myself happier than King David in the evening of his life. In compliance to her fond intreaties, my old Gothic dress was changed into one adapted to the modern taste; and I could not help thinking, that I had cut off at least twenty years from the past roll of my life. I accompanied my angel to all the visiting places, lived high, and seldom went to bed till the morning; but, all of a sudden, the Gout (as they tell me) confined me at home, and brought me to repentance. To add to my misfortune, my sweet partner decamped, taking with her all my cash and my notes, and left me only the following billet,

“As Spring and Winter cannot be united, so neither can youth and old age. I quit you to fly to the arms of youth, with whom I shall enjoy the fruits of your folly. Love is not to be purchased by money: old men should take care of the latter, and give over all thoughts of the former; for, take this as a certain rule, a young girl may flatter an old man, but she can never love him. This is the last and best advice you ever will receive from a woman of pleasure.”

Let this be a useful admonition to others, as well as myself.

———————

THE SWEETS OF CONJUGAL ENDEARMENTS.

Matrimony presupposes a state of unanimity; how then can mutual altercation expect any but a state of discord:

Mr. and Mrs. Snappish are illustrations of this. They came down to breakfast the other morning in perfect placidity, as if the compliments that passed above stairs were to ensure telicity below. “Lord,” cries Mrs. Snappish, “this is odd tasted tea!” “Do you think so my love,” replied the husband, “perhaps your mouth is not in taste: now to me it seems very finely flavoured.” “Oh, execrable,” rejoins the wife, “tis quite musty.” “Musky, you mean,” answered the husband, “for I’m sure it is a perfect perfume, as to the smell.” “It stinks!” exclaimed the lady. “ ’Tis as sweet as a nut,” cries the husband. “Don’t provoke me,” says she. “Don’t put me in a passion,” says he. “Do you threaten, sir;” retorted the lady, “take that for your pains,” tossing the tea-cup in his fore. “D--n!” replies the gentleman, dispatching the cream-pot at her bosom. “I can be as spiteful as you,” says the woman, and slap goes a saucer. “We’ll see that,” cries the man, and dash goes the table. “Vile fellow!” raves the lady, rising and running at the gentleman. “Infamous puss,” answers her swain, ’til at length they have recourse to personal hostilities, and fairly fight it out, to the great dignity of their own characters, and entertainment of their servants.

Fie upon them!

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A HYMN TO VENUS.

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The Register Established last year for Emigrants &c. will be continued at the Quebec General Agency Office, adjoining the National Printing Office, Hope Street. Persons in want of Servants, Mechanics, Labourers &c. can be supplied.—

Charge for every separate Registry, 1s. 3d.

To be Paid at the time of Entry.

All possible attention will be given to the Character of Individuals; though the proprietor cannot be answerable for such.

Sales and Transfers of land and every description of business transacted by Commission.

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FOR SALE,

Several Lots of excellent land directly on the line of the road called Craig’s Road, in the Township of Ireland, the situation most eligible for the erection of Stores, Taverns &c. Purchase Money 20l. for each lot of 100 Acres. Apply to

COL. BOUCHETTE,

Land Surveyor General,

Or the Printer.

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The “thoughts on Imagination” and the article of Hope are much too important to find admittance in the Enquirer—Our kind and useful correspondent G. S. we trust, will produce something more novel or has orders for the next number. Our Work having already been complained of by numerous readers as entering rather too much dry detail, and as not presenting sufficient of interesting matter so requisite and essential to the advancement of a rising Colony—The Editor’s inclination disposing him to accede to the wishes of so respectable a portion of his readers, he must for the future request, that all communications forwarded to him for insertion partake more of the Title and nature of the Work.

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Advertisements inserted at the following rates—
In one Language,

In both Languages, Double the above rates.

N.B. Every 1st insertion must be paid in Advance.

HOUSE OF ASSEMBLY,
Saturday, 13th February, 1819.

Attested by Wm. LINDSAY,

Clk. Assy.

HOUSE OF ASSEMBLY,
Saturday, 3rd February, 1810.

Attested by Wm. LINDSAY,

Clk. Assy.

The Printers of the Newspapers of this Province are requested to insert the above Resolution in the manner directed by the first. Their accounts will be paid at the end of the year at the Clerk’s Office, House of Assembly.

HOUSE OF ASSEMBLY,
Monday, 22nd March, 1819.

CHAMBRE ASSEMBLÉE,
Samedi, 13e. Février, 1819

Attesté WM. LINDSAY,

Gref. Assée

CHAMBRE d’ASSEMBLÉE.
Samedi, 3e. Février, 1810.

Attesté, WM. LINDSAY.

Gref. Assée.

Les Imprimeurs de Papiers-nouvelles en cette Province sont priés d’insérer les Résolutions ci-dessus, en la manière ordonnée par la première. Leurs comptes seront payés à la fin de l’année, en par eux s’adressant au Bureau du Greffier de la Chambre d’Assemblée.

CHAMBRE d’ASSEMBLÉE.
Lundi, le 22 Mars, 1819.

Attesté, WM. LINDSAY.

Gref. Assée.

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Cheap Impenetrable Painting.

D. Reader from London, late foreman to R. Gain, House, Sign and Ornamental Painter, Glazier, &c. Respectfully informs the public, that he has removed to 25, St. Ann street, near the Gaol. D. R. is enabled by a process (which has been approved of by the Royal Society at London) to render Fish Oil superior to Linseed Oil for all kinds of work exposed to the weather, as being far more durable, and at 25 per cent lower than the usual prices.

Chairs and all other furniture painted to any pattern, Maps and Prints varnished, Gilding, &c. &c.

Quebec, August 1, 1821.

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APARTMENTS,

Furnished, Consisting of two Sitting Rooms, two Bed Rooms and a Kitchen; all on the same floor.

The situation is Central and in the Upper Town. Suitable for a genteel small family.

Stabling if Required. Enquire at the National Printing Office, Hope Street.

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TOWNSHIP OF GRANTHAM.

For sale, a Lot of Land, 45 miles to the south of Three Rivers, being No. 2 in the Township of Grantham, consisting of 100 acres five of which is cleared, with a Log House—For 10l. ready money.

PATRICK SMITH,

Drummondville

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Wanted to purchase a Cleared Farm of, from 50 to 100 Acres within nine miles of Quebec.

Inquire at this Office.

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LAND ON EQUAL SHARES,
Without Purchase Money.

The Undersigned, having one thousand acres of as fine LAND as any in the Province, in the Township of Ireland, (where there are several Settlers) within one mile of the Main Road called Craig’s Road, is ready to treat with one person or more, to join in clearing the said Land, and raising a farm for the benefit of all concerned.—No Purchase Money Required.

LIEUT. HORSELEY, R.N.

Additional Reference may be had of the Printer.

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ACADEMY

MR. SHADGETT purposes opening after the Midsummer Vacation a School, on his own account, for the Sons of Merchants, Tradesmen and others.

Reading, Writing, English-Grammar, Arithmetic, Principles of Book-keeping, Elocution, Geography and General History.

In order to give perfect satisfaction to Parents and ensure the comfort and advancement of the youth confided to his care, the number to be admitted will be limited. Those Parents who are desirous of having their Children instructed by Mr. S. are therefore requested to make early application.

Quebec, 17th July, 1821.

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FOR SALE,

A Handsome second hand Portable WRITING DESK. To prevent trouble, Price 8l.

Apply at the Store adjoining the National and British Printing Office.

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DRUMMONDVILLE.

For sale—One hundred acres and more of Land, seven acres of which is cleared and in a state of Cultivation—With a good Log House, Barn &c. Price, 100 Dollars ready money. Apply to

Mr. THOMAS SHEPHERD,

Y Maska, near William Henry

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ACADEMIE ANGLAISE,

MONSR. SHADGETT, se propose après les vacances de cet été, d’ouvrir une École à son propre compte, pour les fils de Negocians, Marchands et autres.

Lire, Écrire, l’Arithmétique, les Élemens de la tenue des livres, l’Elocution, la Geographie, et l’Histoire en general.

Afin de statis faire les parens, et de contribuer autant que possible au bien aise et aux progrès des pupiles confié à ses soins, le nombre en sera limité.

Ceux donc qui se proposent de confier l’éducation de leurs enfans à Mr. S. sont priés de lui en donner avis au plutôt à sa demeure, entre midi et 2 heures, et de 5 à 8 heures du soir.

La Salle d’instruction est vaste, et spacieuse, et bien aisée.

Québec, Juillet 17, 1821.

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CHARLES LODGE,
BOOKBINDER, FROM LONDON,
No 25, St. Ann Street, near the Scotch Church,

RESPECTFULLY returns his grateful thanks to the Public, for the very liberal support he has received since he commenced business on his own account, and begs to make known that his Spring Goods arrived, which from the excellency of the Skins and Patterns will enable him to execute in a very superior manner any work with which he may be entrusted and on the most reasonable terms.

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Mis-spelled words and printer errors have been corrected. Where multiple spellings occur, majority use has been employed.

Punctuation has been maintained except where obvious printer errors occur.

Advertising copy has been consolidated at the end of the magazine.

[The end of The Enquirer Issue 07 of 12 (November 1821) edited by Robert-Anne d’Estimauville]